Lightening up with some advice for the royal family

Let's get back to laugh, shall we?

This article gave some last minute suggestions for the royal baby, should the Duke-n-Dukest need some inspiration:

1. Prince Charles 2: Electric How Do You Do

2. Pumpkin

3. Prince Walter, The One Who Knocks

4. Princess Buttercup, BOOOOO! BOOOOOO!

5. The Baron Of Mustard, In The Library, With The Wrench

6. Beef Wellington

7. Lady (The Power Of Love)

8. Lord Of Leaping (alt: Lady Of Dancing)

9. Thomas, The Richest Baby Ever

10. Princess Powderpuff Of Sephora

11. Duke 79 UNC 75

12. Prince

13. Pardon Me Princess Fancypants Of The Island Of Aren't You Freakin' Special

14. William Philip Arthur Louis George David Harry Charles Beckham Bono

15. The Clark Of Kent

16. 007: Londoneye

17. His Royal Highness Fonzie Of The Kingdom Of Milwaukee

18. Prince Zoolander

19. The Knot Of Windsor

20. Princess Renesmee

Happy baby to you, Duchess Catherine! And thanks for not giving birth yesterday, on my Mr.'s official birthday. He has some deep respect for you, but its shrouded in layers of contempt for British tradition and heavy Yankee media coverage. He was pretty pissed when you hadn't had it by Sunday and was worried he'd have to share his day with your gilded spawn. And as an only child, he's never had to share anything in his life :)

Love to all the birthday babies!

From last year.

Happy Birthday, Katie!

My sister is having a big birthday today!

Happy 3-0, Kate!

Online Shopping Supports My Decision to Not Become a Parent

Searching for a gift for my niece's first birthday (Happy Birthday on the 23rd!), I narrowed my choices down to 3 and let the reviews do the choosing. Among other notes (usefulness, educational level and if it will be gender neutral to share with her brother), these negative reviews steered me toward an easy winner.

"Awful! Loud, chaotic, no real educational value, and worst of all not [the toy it advertised]."

"... a riot of crazy beeps, chimes, and voices goes off. We had it on the quiet setting and even so, it drove us crazy just testing it."

"...it just brings on another seizure-inducing round of flashes and shrill noises."

"... I am reluctant to let her play with it because she can fit the entire circle shapes (cookie and orange) completely into her mouth."

Bwahhahahah! My sister should thank me for avoiding the riotous, seizure-inducing, mouthful toys.

For the baby who has everything? A smartphone with 4-G, Fisher Price technology.

I'm seriously considering writing a check for her college fund. It's the ultimate educational gift and she can share with her brother, should he grow up to be a deadbeat.

Dad Advice

Here's some classic advice from my dad (and some other dad-isms that I just like):

Source: tumblr.com via Princess on Pinterest

Make your butterflies fly in formation.

Roll with the punches.

Don't burn bridges.

What do you think?

Of what?

Anything... The price of tea in China.

Would you do that if the Queen were here?

Buy me a water?

You make a better door than you do a window.

Keep on truckin'

You people laugh at the stupidest things

Get. outta. town.

It's a two-dog night.

You can do it, munch.

LYB

You always said you wanted wax lips or new sock or nothing at all for your birthday.

"Nothing could be more salutary at this stage than a little healthy contempt for a plethora of material things." - Aldo Leopold

Happy Birthday, Dad.

Happy Birthday to Me

First of all, let me thank the readers who contributed to my whopping 119 pageviews and several comments on this post. I'm so glad that it resonated with many of you and that some of you have stuck around to read this! I hope I can continue to develop personal and compelling content on this blog and that it helps you to feel in community. Oh and I hope you find some of it funny. I promise to be more funny.

Onto current matters:

It's my birthday!

I have a good feeling about twenty-seven.

On this Flip-It Friday, I'd like to ask you all what you want for YOUR birthday.

Be it an object, an experience, a wish or a thought, tell me what you're hoping for on your next birthday.

A few things I'm thinking about today:

My Roo-babe came without a definite b-day, so I vowed to share mine with her. We are skipping a fancy dinner tonight to have time to walk Roo ourselves before whatever the Mr. has planned downtown. Happy birthday, Roo-babe! Twinsies!

I take it back

What I want for my birthday is to have drinks with these 4 dudes.

Tomorrow

For my birthday, I would like Pinterest to reinstate useful embedding options. As you know, I used to get a lot of my photos from Pinterest and would credit them as much as the original pinner. Now that Pinterest has changed their layout, they've also changed their embedding. It either doesn't work at all or just doesn't work in Blogger. :(

Fix it by tomorrow, Pinterest. 

Happy Birthday, Gregly!

Grown-Up Advice: How to talk like a lady and Mr. S's Birthday

Lady's don't swear. I'm working on this one as the sailor mouth has gotten really brine-y.

As I can't advise you on how not to swear (maybe insert another word like "AhKellyClarkson!" - like from the movie 40 Year Old Virgin), but I can give you a list of other things you're saying that make you sound like an unprofessional, 14-year-old  idiot.

- Stop saying "like" as a space-filler in conversation. Have someone write down every time you say "like" or wear a rubber band on your wrist for one day and snap it every time you say "like".

- Don't misuse the word "random". Definition: proceeding, made, or occurring without definite aim, reason, or pattern. "Random" is not a cool buzzword to make you seem different or hilarious. Your night was not "so random" last night. That email was not "so random". Your Facebook album from the lake house weekend was not "random".

- I get it, pronouns are hard. Learn when to use "I" or "me", "She" or "her". Correct: "They are going to help her and me." Incorrect: "They are going to help she and I." 


Think grammar doesn't matter? It may matter to your boss. It might be the make or break skill that decides your future. Think I'm being dramatic? Read this.

That said, let's not all become the grammar police. If we know what people are saying (and we aren't their superior), it's best to let mistakes slide. If you are in the position to use someone's grammatical mistake as a teaching point, make sure you doing it gracefully. No one likes a know-it-all.

And for Heaven's sake, don't use proper grammar and then point it out to people. If using correct grammar requires clarification, maybe you should change or simplify your sentence structure.

I'll admit that I get hung up on lie/lay (people lie down themselves, people lay down objects) and hanged/hung (again, one for people and another for objects), but I try to sort it out each time I use these words to make a new, correct habit out of it.

Do you stumble over any particular grammar rules? Are you a stickler for grammar or do you think grammar may be becoming less relevant?

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This past weekend it was the Mr.'s birthday. His paternal family hosted a wonderful celebration at a lake house on Lake Gage near Angola, Indiana. It was in the 80's, sunny and quiet. Such a good time!

Lake house. Lake hair. Per usual, I didn't wash my hair all weekend. 'Twas pretty gross by the end, but the schmoutz helps you need less hairspray to hold your hair together with the wind/wave runner/lake water variables.

Local wine. Only sold in Indiana. Made in Steuben County. This one was pretty good. The red was just so-so in my opinion (too sweet).

The birthday chair. He's 28 going on 8, so we brought out the child in him.

I made brownies...

And his aunt got a lovely cake from a boutique baker in Ft. Wayne. He got to blow out the candles on two desserts for twice the birthday wishes!

He really got into it the second time around.

If you follow me on Instagram, you already saw these. Sorry for nothing new!