Women, listen up: It never hurts to ask!
I was explaining to my doc how I had asked my HR to look into why certain things weren't covered on my health insurance. She looked into it little by little. I kept pressing her for answers. I'm not saying that I did all the heavy lifting in amending my healthcare plan to include an expensive solution catered to me, but I did do my part.
What was my part? I asked.
My doc said she went to a conference especially for women about maximizing your career. She said that wage discrepancies and other unfair deals in the workplace can partially be blamed on the women who get the short end of the stick. She said that women aren't as likely as men to ask for what they want and therefore don't get as large of a slice of the pie.
Similarly, my aunt-in-law is shopping around for jobs in the investment industry. She has worked for one firm for a long time and is holding several certifications and some awesome retirement benefits through this firm. However, she is not moving up or being encouraged there. She feels pressed to get more work out on a shorter time span and with no added compensation. She worries that if she leaves, she'll lose some of her certifications and some of her retirement benefit potential. This could of course all be true, but while she's shopping around, she could just ask the potential employer for the same benefits. She could also get a comparison salary from the potential employer and bring it back to her current employer as leverage.
And if it all doesn't work out, at least she asked.
I think some women get caught up in feelings and friendship and forget that our jobs are just that - it's just business.
Our employers are using us to make money, essentially. We can't feel sorry for them when we want to leave and we can't hang around just hoping that they'll give us what we deserve. Everyone is out for themselves and that means you should be too.
Now, I'm not saying that you be disrespectful, entitled or arrogant. Don't ask for a raise unless you have a compelling argument for how you've earned it. Don't question a policy unless you see a reason to change it and can back it up. Don't ask for a work-from-home day unless you know you can still keep up with your responsibilities. See the big picture.
In my personal circle, there are more hardworking women than lazy ones. Chances are, you deserve a raise/time-off/casual-Friday/choice hours/a chance to start a fundraiser at your company. It never hurts to ask. The worst that could happen is they say "no".
Peggy Olson from Mad Men was a timid secretary in the first season ...
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... and is now in season 5, making today's equivalent of $131k because she wasn't afraid to play ball with business and ask.
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